Yesterday seemed to be getting off to a good start. I’d set my sights on completing a project that I’ve been postponing and procrastinating on for over a year and a half. Nineteen months actually. That’s when Xy smashed a window out in our kitchen with her bare hand, in a blind drunken rage.
I’m just kidding about the drunken rage. Actually she was swatting a fly. Luckily she didn’t slit her wrist and bleed to death.
I tried replacing it back around Thanksgiving — of 2006. I bought a new pane of glass, and all other necessary supplies: glazing compound, glazier’s points, a sanding block, a putty knife, linseed oil. I commandeered the neighbor’s ladder from the yard of his abandoned house.
Only when I climbed up to do the deed, I realized to my horror that the AC unit would have to be removed to properly do the job.
And so the procrastination began.
Eventually the cardboard I’d put in place with duct tape had to be replaced. I persisted in calling it “Xy’s Folly.” Not really fair. But still good for a laugh.
Finally after all these months I got around to it. Our neighbor’s ladder had disappeared in the interim. I posted to my neighborhood discussion group and immediately got two offers to loan me a ladder. Good ole Joe L. was kind enough to bring his ladder by on Thursday.
And so on Friday I removed the AC unit and then lugged the ladder into the yard of the neighboring house. That was an adventure in itself, since Craig’s yard is now overgrown with weeds reaching eight feet in some cases. It’s a jungle over there.
Once I climbed the ladder, however, I was in for another unpleasant surprise. I’d measured wrong a year and half ago. The replacement glass was a wee bit too small. I’d gotten an odd size, 14 7/8″ x 15 5/8″, but upon more careful measuring I found the pane should be exactly 15″ x 16″.
And so I made a trip back to Lakeview, to the nearest place I know that cuts glass to order, the same Harry’s Ace I’d bought the wrong-sized glass from in 2006.
Then, with right-sized glass in hand, I confidently scaled the ladder and slapped some glaze on there.
At last! Mission accomplished. I breathed a sigh of relief. It was a good day.
And then the glass cracked.
Today, the newspaper headlines reveal I wasn’t the only person who had a bad Friday:
- Jim Bernazzani, the head of the local FBI, was yanked from his post and unceremoniously ordered back to DC. The reason? He shot his mouth off about becoming our next mayor. I agree with this action, by the way. As much as I relished his pursuit of corrupt politicians, he stepped over a line, and he had to go.
- But far more horrific: Three masked men invaded a home in the 7th Ward just after noon and murdered three young adults. An infant in the house was unharmed. Police have no suspects and no motives.
Today it’s raining and raining and raining.
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Sorry to hear about the crack man. After all that work, and procrastination, it sucks to see those sorts of results. Do you know why the glass cracked? Being a NOLA virgin, could it be a moisture issue?
Lee, I think it cracked because it was a bit of a tight fit. Probably should have had them cut the glass 1/16″ shorter.
Every cloud has a silver lining. Now you can re-label the window “Christy’s crackhouse”!
As Bart’s father, I shouldn’t, but I did, laugh out loud over this story. Brooks’ comment about “Christy’s crackhouse” added to the humor.
Sigh…I have a similar task to undertake.
The break could also be from the glazing points. You want them snug, but not too tight. They can put pressure on the glass which causes…
“Sorry to hear about the crack, man [crack-man?]. After all that work, and procrastination, it sucks to see those sorts of results.”
This statement could be repeated verbatim to any N.O. politician, police captain, etc.
ooopsie! Too bad you didn’t have a small glass grinder close at hand.
Has Xy begun calling it “Bart’s Folly”?
Celcus, you may be right. I did put those points in a little tight.
Liprap, I have labeled it B’s Folly myself. I do have a sense of fair play after all.
Dad, glad to know I you could enjoy a laugh at my expense.
Xy thinks there’s some sort of glue or something you can put on cracked glass. I’ve never heard of such a product.
Dow Corning silicone glue would seal it up, as would some Loctite Ultraviolet glue that sets in the sun, but both glues would yellow over time. Really, you are better off replacing the pane, sad to say.
Don’t pay attention to that rubbish! I’ve had a cracked pane for 9 years since I bought the house. Believe me if you got used to the cardboard, the crack will not cause loss of sleep.
However, if you want to sell than you’ll have to fix it.
Next time use newspaper to fill around the glass. Works every time!
Peace,
Tim