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Latest Entry in the Annals of Idiocy

This morning, Xy was sitting in our car, waiting to give a ride to some co-workers. A short time later, I got a text message: “u have the car.” I looked out the window and saw, sure enough, Xy was gone but the car was still there. Must have been a mix-up about who was giving a ride to whom.

Then came the follow-up text: “oops, keys r n car.” So I went down and checked it out. Yup, the keys were in the ignition. Not only that, but the engine was running. And the doors were unlocked.

The first reaction most people have when I relate this story is, of course, that “it’s because she’s pregnant.” It’s a compulsion. Go ahead and say it; you know you want to, and it will make you feel better. But I can’t help recalling what Xy’s mother said when I first met her 15 years ago: “If she had half a brain she’d be dangerous.” And, for the record, she wasn’t pregnant then.

This is the silliest stunt she’s pulled since smashing out the kitchen window or flushing her keys down the toilet. In fact, it’s so stupid it seems like something I would do.

Published inLife with Xy


  1. That is terribly funny, and completely absurd. I just can’t figure out how she walked out of the car without turning off the engine or anything? Just watch her, she might go to work naked next!

  2. Frank Schiavo Frank Schiavo

    She might have been angry with one of the people she was car-pooling with today, been really late and forgetful or just flumoxed with a work problem and gotten so carried away by it that she did this. I’ve left my house unlocked and the windows wide open with something in the microwave cooking and not realized it until I got home that night. It just happens sometimes. Shes likely to be more bummed out/perplexed by it than you could ever be.

  3. HK HK

    just be careful. you’re in the 9th month. everything she does is “just fine, honey”. customary tones of mockery that can be handled under normal circumstances, can bite you pretty hard right now.
    you might want to put this entry under password protection!

  4. Rachel Rachel

    A good friend of mine was 7+ months pregnant with twins 4+ years ago. At work one afternoon, she walks in looking as lost as could be. “I flushed my keys down the toilet, and I don’t know what to do,” were the words she spoke. I couldn’t help but laugh, but she seriously had lost all senses and didn’t know what to do next. My co-worker and I jumped into action. I called Building Support to come snake the keys out, and she went with our pregnant friend back to the bathroom to make sure no one else used that stall. Needless to say, she boiled the keys, threw away all of the keyrings, and we laughed about it for months more. I WILL NOT take my keys with me to the bathroom when I am pregnant. Knowing me, I would flush my keys too :-).

  5. Dr. A Dr. A

    Yesterday, I temporarily lost my datebook (found it turned in at the security desk in the afternoon -thank goodness!) and my work keys (left in my lab coat -found this morning after checking with security again and having them open up for me!)
    It WAS a full moon….and a full eclipsed red and teal moon at that! That’s my excuse! Or maybe I just have half a brain!
    Best to you and Xy!

  6. peptide peptide

    i left my passenger side car door wide open for an hour while packing up to move this past year. my computer and flat panel monitor were in there, as well as a pile of random crap that probably served as camouflage. i’d made several trips back and forth and then took a break to eat. when i came back and found what i’d done i felt so stupid.. and so lucky – nothing was taken. ah, folly.

  7. Years ago She locked her keys in the car with the engine running, more that once. Once i was in form of the train station.

    One of my neighbors once left the lights on in his car. I gave him a jump and he was sitting on the stoop with the engine running to charge the battery. Someone jumped in the car and drove off. He was less that five feet away.

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