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I feel like I’m just waking up from a week-long funk. The beatdown in front of our house really disturbed me. Then, when Milo went missing, it brought up all kinds of dark feelings. All kinds of grief came surging back again. It was almost like a drug, numbing me. I went through the motions of running errands and doing chores and so forth, but my head was in a very weird place. I even videotaped a friend’s musical performance, but I felt like I wasn’t really there. It’s odd how grief seems to flatten me, and odd to see how the personality reasserts itself. It’s hard to explain, but I feel like I was not myself, and now I’ve come back to myself. Normally I wouldn’t get so distraught over a cat gone missing for a few hours. So I think it was much more than that. I’m not sure why I started feeling better yesterday, but I do I feel better now.

Published inMiscellaneous


  1. I know how you feel about how seemingly small incidents trigger depressing feelings. Hopefully, this will eventually stop.

    It seems that even the smallest injustice is magnified for me. Hey, I know life’s not fair and bad stuff happens, but I’m kind of tired of learning that lesson.

    Take care my friend. I look forward to working with you again. Every time I drive past that shiny white Saturn it makes me smile. Love you guys. Hang in there!

  2. I’m glad you’re feeling better, and its so true that the psyche constantly and consistently seeks equilibrium. Sometimes the process of flattening and reasserting can be exhausting, though.

    And I’m glad ya’ll made it out to Ama on Saturday. If I’d known you were in a funk I would have made sure you had more than just a sip of Absinthe…

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