We played host over the weekend to an eleven-year-old boy whose mother (a friend of ours) had to make a trip out of town. But it was a trip for us as well even though we stayed here. I was reminded of what a radically different way children have of being in the world. They are not constrained by the same norms of social behavior that govern (some) adults. Our toddler throws me for a loop on a regular basis, but I’m not used to being around preteen kids, and it was a bit of a shock to the system. But most shocking of all was the crash-course in popular culture I received at the hands of our guest. Ever heard of something called “YouTube Poop”? I hadn’t. There is an entry on this phenomenon at Wikitubia which defines it as “videos composed of sentence mixing, sound distortion, repetition and other strange techniques.” Here’s an example that is probably the most popular to date:
Keep in mind there are apparently thousands of these out there. Many of them are quite short and violent. Some of our guest’s favorites seem to involve Sponge Bob blowing people’s heads off.
Like this:
Now imagine that played at loud volume repeatedly for hours on end, and you’ll begin to understand my fragile emotional state.
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Heh. That kid used to spend a fair amount of time youtubing at my old library branch. Now I know what he was watching.
Give them some chisels and gouges and a chunk of wood, and let them
LEARN something by physically DOING something, and move them toward
calligraphy and writing.
Are we seriously assuming that this kid-example of a generation- is going to
make a life by total immersion in this insane cyber-screen-staring-trip?
NO!
They are doomed to horrible failure.
Damn kid, fuck you, YTP isn’t for kids.
That article looks like a deeldough
NO! Our generation is doomed by this insane acid trip called “You Tube Poop”! We must make our children go outside more, read more books. When I was a child I wasn’t watching weird space alien crap! I was climbing trees, doing homework! I swear if I catch my son watching any bullshit like this im gonna beat his ass. OUR GENERATION IS DOOMED! This is the kind of shit that causes murder! People raised by cruel rude videos. From some child watching that, he could go and blow someone head off! What has happened to our young youth, what has happened.
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST PEOPLE! Are you REALLY not letting your children explore the outside world? They are going to find out about this stuff anyways, so why bother? And I know some of you are going to say “He doesn’t know what he is talking about, he just another ‘DOOMED’ kid that watched this horrible crap!” Well as a straight A (AND YES, STRAIGHT A!) honor roll high school student I do watch YouTube Poop for entertainment. Something you Soccer-mom’s don’t have a clue about. When I watched YouTube Poop, it actually boosted my imagery and creative skills (such as writing skills). Dispite YouTube Poop having crude humor, suggestive themes, and bad language, it’s only for entertainment purposes. Take William Shakespear for example, he is known for his poetic writing and dramatic story telling, but has a twisted mind for gruesome fights and sexual incest scenes. YouTube Poop has it’s sentence splicing that allows children to analyze and boost up better hearing. To me, they are going to learn this shit anyways by a friend or even just by hearing it out of curiosity.
So if your child does watch YouTube Poop I guess that your just gonna have to…
(Puts sunglasses on)
DEAL WITH IT!
PICKLE BOY HE LIKES TO HURT AND TEASE PICKLES