Lightbulb

I purchased a General Electric Longlife Plus 3-Way Soft White 100 Energy Saving Bulb a couple weeks ago from the local hardware store. A sticker on the package says it’s guaranteed for eight years; the fine print specifies 10,000 hours. The bulb cost $15.79. Wow, that’s a lot. But the package also claims it will save me $71 in energy costs. Supposedly it uses less than half the energy of an incandescent bulb and lasts five times as long.

I like the idea, but I’m a little skeptical. We’ve bought a few of these “long life” bulbs since we got our house two years ago, and at least one has already burnt out.

Furthermore, the extra-fine squinty print says that if it doesn’t last as long as advertised, “return bulb, proof of purchase, register receipt and your name and address.” How many people will have a receipt and proof of purchase for a fricking lightbulb eight years down the road?

Me, that’s who. I’m putting this in my files, in the folder marked “Machines,” and if it burns out before January 2013, General Electric will be hearing from me.

Yes, I’m really sticking it to the man today.