Parr for the Course
A True-Life Telemarketing Conversation
This is Bart Everson calling on behalf of McGraw-Hill. May I please speak with Pam Parr ?
She's no longer with the company.
Oh, well, I'm trying to reach whoever's currently in charge of network management there; do you know who that would be?
That would be me.
Great! It's becuz of your professional involvement that McGraw-Hill would like to send out a preview of the PC Network Management Set for a 30-day preview. This is the 1996 edition of the three-volume set, it gives you over 1,000 pages of the latest information you need to prepare, implement and survive the corporate network process. It covers every aspect of the field: building your network, maintaining your system and preventing malfunctions. There's really too much to describe over the phone so I'll get it out to you, try it on the job to see how it will benefit you, and then decide, OK!!
I understand your reluctance, but this set really must be seen to be appreciated. It covers all your networking needs from start to finish, and it even includes a disk of valuable network utilities. So I'll send it out to you --
No you won't.
Well, that's a provisional statement of course.
The sales pitch. I know.
Now this is not a sales call --
Oh, it's free?
No, but it is a risk-free preview --
I said I'm not interested.
I'm not trying to pursue the offer, ma'am, I'm simply trying to communicate to you as a human being.
I get these same calls at home. I find them obnoxious and offensive there. Now you're calling me at work.
Obnoxious and offensive?
Yes. Whatever happened to the idea of sending out promotional literature in the mail? These phone solicitations are an invasion of privacy.
Well, gosh, for me it's just a matter of, you know, making a living.
I know; I feel sorry for you. I really do. Becuz I find these solicitations very offensive, and so do most people I know.
Hmm, you may not be aware of this, but you can always ask a telemarketer to remove your name from their list -- and we will. We're required to by law.
Oh really? Yes, that's what I want, to be removed from the list.
But you are not on my list, remember? I was calling for Pam Parr.
If McGraw-Hill can be of service in the future, please call 614/759-3773.
Honestly, this kind of thing is driving me away from McGraw-Hill.
Well, I understand that. One of my favorite bands is Rage Against the Machine, and they performed recently on Saturday Night Live. They tried to hang upside-down flags from their speakers, but the SNL stage crew ripped them down, and after they performed they were told to leave. They never got to play a second song like bands usually do on that show. So when I found out I called NBC Viewer Services to express my frustration. But there was no answer.
[laughs] It's been a pleasure speaking with you.
The same. Have a pleasant day.